Dear Santa
December 12th 2006 02:29
Dear Santa,
It’s been a while since I’ve written; in fact this is my first time, as I haven’t believed in you till now. But these are desperate times and desperate times call for desperate action.
Unlike the usual letters you receive, I won’t be asking for the latest toys or an Ipod, instead I’m begging you for a Christmas miracle or two as I’ve run out of ideas myself.
What are the chances of finding a bank that wont take 4 attempts to deliver a set of credit cards, won’t lie to you about sending a courier to your house even though they warn you to stay home all day waiting for it and whose staff who ‘take personal responsibility’ for your case won’t go into hiding when it becomes evident that the cards are faulty when they’re finally delivered.
If this is too difficult then perhaps you can find us a pest control service that will turn up despite warning you to stay home on the day due to their overwhelming popularity and if for some reason their technician calls in sick, (yep, I assumed it was the chemicals too but it was actually the day after their Christmas Party) it dawns on them that they better call their customers who are waiting around like idiots in their pest infested homes.
Then there is always an electricity utility whose caring and responsible approach to digging up the street to replace old wiring will also extend to the trees lining the street which they’ve been asked to destroy so that they have somewhere to park their machinery. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to bother you with this last one but it seems the council guy responsible for tree preservation is far too busy collecting protection bonds from building sites to do anything about this.
Your new found believer,
Paul
It’s been a while since I’ve written; in fact this is my first time, as I haven’t believed in you till now. But these are desperate times and desperate times call for desperate action.
Unlike the usual letters you receive, I won’t be asking for the latest toys or an Ipod, instead I’m begging you for a Christmas miracle or two as I’ve run out of ideas myself.
What are the chances of finding a bank that wont take 4 attempts to deliver a set of credit cards, won’t lie to you about sending a courier to your house even though they warn you to stay home all day waiting for it and whose staff who ‘take personal responsibility’ for your case won’t go into hiding when it becomes evident that the cards are faulty when they’re finally delivered.
If this is too difficult then perhaps you can find us a pest control service that will turn up despite warning you to stay home on the day due to their overwhelming popularity and if for some reason their technician calls in sick, (yep, I assumed it was the chemicals too but it was actually the day after their Christmas Party) it dawns on them that they better call their customers who are waiting around like idiots in their pest infested homes.
Then there is always an electricity utility whose caring and responsible approach to digging up the street to replace old wiring will also extend to the trees lining the street which they’ve been asked to destroy so that they have somewhere to park their machinery. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to bother you with this last one but it seems the council guy responsible for tree preservation is far too busy collecting protection bonds from building sites to do anything about this.
Your new found believer,
Paul
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